surreal illusions motorsport photography

Photo Guide

My guide to taking photos:

  1. Buy a camera.
  2. Take it out of the box.
  3. Throw away any instruction booklets. They are useless.
  4. Put battery in.
  5. Run back to the shop to buy a memory card.
  6. Put memory card in.
  7. Swap the memory card and battery over as you put them in the wrong place.
  8. Realise the camera isn't working and throw it out the window.
  9. Quickly run outside and catch it as you've had a brilliant idea.
  10. Recharge the battery.
  11. Wait a bit. perhaps you can read a book, or watch tv, or maybe take the pet camel for a walk.
  12. Take out newly charged battery and put in camera.
  13. As you believe in bad luck, there is no step 13.
  14. Switch camera on.
  15. Swirl it around a bit as you now view the world through the camera lens.
  16. Fall over as you got dizzy.
  17. Pick yourself up and look around to check no-one is watching.
  18. Smile to yourself and laugh evily as you now hve a new toy in which you may be able to cause world domination.
  19. Put the kettle on and make youself a cup of tea.
  20. Take a picture of your pet camel and share with your imaginery friends with their pet camels.

Have fun!

Saturday 17th May 2008



Upcoming events for photo opportunities in 2008:

F3/GT
BTCC
DTM
Lotus-on-Track
All the usual suspects, plus whatever else thats interesting...

" If you really want something in life you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers. (Homer Simpson) "
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